This one may stir some emotion…….
It appears that lately the word obey has become one of those ‘no-say-words’. We’ve dropped it from many of the wedding vows and each time the Bible passage is read: Wives obey (be submissive) your husbands (Col. and Eph), people twitch a bit. What is so bad about that word, obey?
We seem to have no problem with children obeying. As a matter of fact, when they disobey, they are sometimes punished. A disobedient child in a store gets attention and lots of ‘shakes of the head’. And, the obedience of children is taught because it helps the child, not hurts them. (In healthy homes, of course). But, I guess when we reach a certain age (?), we don’t have to obey anymore.
Jesus certainly obeyed…..boy, did he ever. His obedience cost him his life. But his obedience was his choice and he obeyed and submitted (another no-no word) to his Father’s will.
But wives obeying? Well, that is not good, that seems to show that we are second class citizens, that we are weak, that we don’t know enough to make our own decisions…..or does it? Follow those Scripture references and you will see that the very next line is ‘husbands, love your wives’. Love, I think that it the key word, the word that makes all the difference, the word that makes obedience ok.
If a husband truly loves his wife, the way that Christ loves his Church, the way that the Father loves the Son, then obedience is not a chore, it is a joy. Is it easy? Never. But it is what flows from love. Love does not demand blind obedience, it gently asks for trust, faithfulness, obedience. Love knows that staying true brings joy, peace, and all the fruits of the Holy Spirit. Love is never forced.
Maybe we should look at our definition of ‘obey’. One is to follow the command or guidance of…… If obeying a husband requires you to act in a way that hurts you or that makes you unequal than I would say that that is not what is meant by that Scripture verse. If a husband truly loves (Biblical love) his wife, than the relationship is equal and the word ‘obey’ takes on a whole new meaning. There is mutual respect, sharing of ideas, decisions, trusting and relying on one another. There is shared love and shared obedience.
If Christ obeyed his Father, than can it be a bad thing????? Anyway, some random thoughts…..be easy on me!